Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
Randomize
