My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
They just made me take another shot and I found out the liquor store next to my brothers house has a petting zoo
Mind. Blown.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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