Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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