my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
