Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I could make wine with my vomit
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
MIDGETS
????
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
