You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
