pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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