If i could tip my vagina, i would.
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Good, be his mentor. Like a tiny gay Yoda.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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