If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
