I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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