I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
