It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
