Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
