so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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