At least make sure they are 18
Why
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize