I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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