You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
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