How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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