All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
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