Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
when are you leaving homes?
it's 7:51. why the fuck are you awake at 7:51
I had a sex dream about Oprah.
go back to sleep
dude. it was a sex dream. about. Oprah.
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
