Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
