dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
