he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Randomize
