i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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