Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
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