Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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