do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
NoShamevember. You game?
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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