Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I found what appears to be half an E pill and part of a tooth in my pocket this morning
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Randomize
