You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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