why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
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