Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I've heard awesome things about their margaritas. I also may buy a mustache from party city. Would you do me with a mustache on??! Hahahaha. But, really.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize