if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
