wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
Randomize
