you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
