I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
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