I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
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