That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
