You really coming over, don't trick.
actually, I'm a sock model
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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