Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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