Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
