I'm so fucking centered right now
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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