girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
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