Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
