No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
There r osticjed everywhere
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize