This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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