I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
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