And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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