You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
