we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
