I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Randomize