i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize
